Wicked Wednesday has rolled around once more, so let’s get
down to some gorgeous gossipy goodness.
Muscle bound lothario Arnold Schwarzenegger is causing yet
more controversy over his womanising and spawning of illegitimate children via
a tell-all book entitled Total Recall: My
Unbelievably True Life Story. But according to close friends of Shriver’s
his Total Recall is addled by his roid rage and it is about as truthful as a
John Banks statement. (This is the opinion of Penny Ashton, Penny Ashton repeat
Penny Ashton.) I am never one to
believe “sources close to the xyz” but he hardly appeared contrite and was
apparently laughing about certain no doubt painful recollections for Shriver. His book does praise her continually,
which is something after 25 years of marriage, but he is a man of secrets which
is interesting in a Governor. Apparently he didn’t tell Maria he was undergoing
Open Heart surgery and also did not inform her of his plans to run for Governor
until 3 days before announcing.
He’s so special. I believe Nadzeya Ostapchuk has a poster of him on her wall.
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| Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww |
It’s alimentary my dear readers. That’s right, Bieber seems have caught a little Bieber Fever
causing his peristalsis action to reverse, much like I do at the sound of his
music, and depositing his milk onstage during a concert in Arizona. Some might say he was sick at the sound
of his own voice, especially as the track seems to continue when he is in mid
toast tossing, but whatever the reason mid way through a dance routine Bieber
swings around, throws up then runs offstage. I may not be a fan of his sounds but I have to give the
wee-un mad props for coming back onstage not long after and finishing an
energetic show. He’s a true
professional to be sure and his fans got to see a side of him they never have
before, his insides. Well done
laddie. I expect a pile of vomit
will appear on ebay anyday now.
Seriously Vegas needs to sort itself out. There are some massive leakages
occurring and quite frankly I am scared to go there and do naughty things as it
seems all news no longer stays in Vegas.
This week it’s Paris Hilton’s new boyfriend causing issues. Apparently, buoyed on by one too many
Mountain Dew’s, Ms Hilton decided to get better acquainted with a lady’s
tonsils in the XS nightclub in the Encore casino. However her new man River
Viiperi decided he didn’t want to share his Barbie Doll and after throwing a
tanty went onto to assault the woman’s boyfriend. No doubt the victim was telling River to calm down and stop
ruining the show. (CODA new
reports are surfacing to say none of it is true. That’s so the first time that’s ever happened….)
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| This is me partying in Vegas with my tongue. |
Anne Hathaway may have freaked out at lopping off her long
luscious locks to play Fantine in Les Miserables but she still looks rather
stunning to me and her wedding pics show the same. She married her longtime
boyfriend and jewellery designer Adam Schulman this week in Big Sur California
and looks to be somewhat blissed out.
As a new marriage celebrant myself I am a big fan of weddings and people
in lerrrrve are rather marvellous.
I also cannot wait to see her singing the snot out of I Dreamed a Dream
on the big screen. I know every
single lyric to Les Mis so don’t sit next to me.
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| Clearly an authorised photo. |
It’s baby popping time in Hollywood this week with both
Reese Witherspoon and Drew Barrymore spitting out little bundles of pooey
goodness. Personally I like to leave breeding to those with more patience and
waterproof clothing, but it’s nice to see other people re-populate the
planet. Drew was quite the
adorable child so I hope she keeps her daughter off her path to drugs and good
times all facilitated by that notorious drug fiend E.T. Drew’s daughter is named Olive whilst
Reese’s little lad is called Tennessee. I see country music in his future… oh
and PS how will he be fed….. With a Spoon. Get it!!!
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| Not a famous child but my niece. CUTE! |
My shock look of the week is none other than that charming
18 year old of good taste Courtney Stodden. For those in the don’t know Courtney married Green Mile
actor Doug Hutchison, 52, at the tender age of 16. Let’s say it together….. ewwwwwwwwww. She tweets pure sugar and
rainbow unicorns but now they have enrolled in the reality show Couples Therapy. This seems like a great show where couples
attempt to save their marriages by talking about it on the tele. Genius. This is Courtney taking her dog for a run, in just your
average jogging outfit.
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